One of my final projects for a course this semester was to throw a party for queers. The party was called “A Night in Berlin;” there were two DJs, paint, canvases, drinks, candy, and a drag show. To be completely honest, I did not do much of the planning but rather carried my weight by being a bottle girl of sorts, serving jello shots to my peers from a small pink tray. Shoutout to my classmates for throwing what was probably the best party that small college town has seen…in my humble opinion.
A Night in Berlin was the final for my ‘Queer of Color Critique’ class, in which we read a variety of queer theorists’ work about everything from sex and porn to solidarity with Palestine and, evidently, what it means to party.
This past Saturday I turned 21 and one of the bars I went to was a gay bar called Club Cumming. My friends and I met some guys from Queens on the way there and brought them with us, but once they sensed the gayness they dipped. “Y’all are weird,” is what they said before their swift departure. We may be, but it is surely not because we went to Club Cumming at 3 am and drank espresso martinis. But thank you.
At a Night in Berlin, the last song we played was Last Dance by Donna Summer because our professor told us a story about the last night in a closing bar where the DJ played a remix of Last Dance x Move Ya Body and everyone was crying, dancing, and queer. I love the song Last Dance because I love Donna Summer (music taste courtesy of my mother) but also because a last dance is never really a last dance. If you ask me when the last time I danced was, I couldn’t tell you because I do it so often. My last dance was probably two minutes ago while I waited for my English muffin to toast.
Earlier in the semester I attended a party that was also attended by Latine alumni. I danced all night with these two older men – whom I’m unsure if they were a couple but they were certainly familiar with each other in some way. While I was dancing salsa with one of them, the more timid one, he held me close and I asked him if I was a good salsa partner. He told me “If you let yourself sink into the other person’s hips, then you’re good.”
Hailo’s been writing about being a playgirl recently, and for me I think this persona is most honestly expressed while I’m dancing -- I guess I am a bit of a MadHatter in that way. Perhaps a MadHatter/playgirl combination is where I most authentically land. I recommend reading Hailo's description of playgirl-ness to better understand what I mean, because frankly I am not really sure how to describe it. Maybe you will understand it better if you dance with me.
I want to hear about your dances or parties or whatever it is you do to celebrate and play, girl. Submit here, can’t wait to read :) I also would love it if you added your Last Dance-esque songs to this collaborative playlist!!!! I love music and I would love to share this love with you.
Some updates
I’m going to Paris!! I will be there for the first half of June and so any WW posts during that time will probably be coming to you in podcast form, which you can find here.
I will be spending the rest of the summer writing a screenplay for a short film that I’ll be filming in the fall/winter. If you are a screenwriter or actor or music producer or anything at all remotely related to what it takes to make a film – I will be putting out a call for people to join this at the end of the summer. Follow @allovevic on IG or my substack to stay updated (if you are a screenwriter and wanna help me out…DM me. Would be much appreciated)!
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